Even though Anna Nicole Smith didn't directly kill anyone, nor did she contribute to the detriment of the rest of the world in a significant way enough to want her dead per se, I am still totally okay with the fact that she is no longer with us. It seems as though anytime anyone dies, we are expected to feel a sense of remorse or sadness despite the sort of relationship (real or imaginary) that we have had with this person. If I go through my whole life thinking someone is -- let's say -- a money-grubbing whore, I feel that it's only honest to still feel that way even if they happen to choke on some vomit and die.
I went to the grocery store after work to grab a couple items for dinner, shortly after the 'news' of Anna Nicole's death had been circulated. There was an older guy in line who looked like your typical older blue-collar worker and he was discussing the news with the cashier, a girl who looked to be a peer of mine. The girl was incredulous upon news of Smith's death, as she was just finding out from the man in front of me. By the time I stepped through to pay for my items, the 'I-can't-believe-that-just-happened' look was still on her face and compelled her to try to pass it on to me as well.
"Is that really true?" she asked me, wide-eyed while scanning my items.
"Yep."
"That's just so terrible," she said as she busied herself bagging my groceries, "I mean... she was just only 39, and ugh... that little baby..." she trailed off, shaking her head. "I just can't believe it."
"You can't?" I said, sarcastically. She looked up at me with a confused look. "I mean, have you ever heard the woman talk?"
I realized it was pretty pointless to get in some sort of pop culture discussion with the cashier at the grocery store but I pressed on.
"It could've been worse," I started, "It could have been someone who actually made a positive contribution to society instead of someone that just sucked it dry and forced everyone into hearing all about all the shameless drama she brought onto herself. Probably the best thing that ever happened to that baby was that it won't remember ever meeting its mother."
The cashier handed me my bag quietly and stared at me as if I had horns slowly growing from my head.
"Have a good one," I said cheerfully, and walked toward the doors.
Anna Nicole Smith had one purpose for the rest of us, and it wasn't for us to admire her. Maybe you saw that episode of Boston Legal in which Heather Locklear co-starred, however there is a term that was brought up that pretty much sums up her sole media purpose: Schadenfreude. Schadenfreude is a German word that means 'pleasure taken from someone else's misfortune'. People get caught up in celebrities for this very reason, often coming to their own conclusions of someone in the public eye that they have never even met. Anna Nicole Smith went against practically every moral I have ever had, we never would have been friends in real life, and I take more comfort in her death than her life although both levels hover around zero. I'm just saying I don't care.
Take a look at the timeline of Anna Nicole Smith and you can too become comfortable with the fact that she is dead. If you believe in Karma at all, know that justice was done.
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